Wrestleverse: Eternal #5 (Uncoded til tomorrow)

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Opening Segment

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We cut from the feed to the backstage area where a drained looking version of Danny Powers is seen front and center. 

Danny Powers: Last week...last week didn't exactly end how any of us would've expected to. Many feel that our former champion Aiden Reynolds was robbed and while rules are rules, I've listened. I HEAR you and in a way, I agree. So tonight, EVERYTHING gets cleared up. Stipulations are announced and well...we've got one contender for the tag titles. So, if you'll excuse me. I've got to go find another. Thank you all and enjoy the show..

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Bonnie Derryberry/Murder Ninja/Quinn Castillo vs. The Three DUDES

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Highway Star hits the venue and The Three DUDES come out playing air guitar and having a good ol' freaking time.

Dunkin Frewbly: The following contest is a Trios match and is scheduled for one fall! Entering first, the team of Nicky, Knees and Donnie… The! Three! DUDES!!

They shoot devil horns towards each other and the crowd before sprinting down and sliding into the ring to wait for their match.

Naida West: The Three DUDES making their in-ring debut here in Wrestleverse, hoping for a big win over a trio of odd bedfellows.

"Another Level" by Oh The Larceny plays and the fans belt a collective pop as Bonnie emerges from the back being accompanied by her animal of the week .

Dunkin Frewbly: And their opponents, introducing first. From parts well known, accompanied by Morton the Muskellunge, this is BONNIE! DERRYBERRY!!!

The fans are in awe of the beast she brings and cheer louder. She lets some of the fans interact with it. Once at ringside she stations the beast at the assigned spot then slides into the squared circle and plays to the cheering spectators. She belts out a mighty beastly she-roar before retreating to her corner.

Hannibal Burress: Nothing strange about that… just a great addition to the team.

“Gasoline” by Audioslave cues up. Quinn comes out from behind the curtain and walks to the ring with no theatrics.

Dunkin Frewbly: Her partner! From Hyannis, Massachusetts. He is "Cast Iron", QUINN! CASTILLO!!

He pulls himself onto the apron by grabbing the second rope. Ducking inside, he immediately goes to his corner where he removes his vest and lets it drop outside, and waits. His music fades as “Vibin” by Masked Wolf hits, and Murder Ninja walks out to the entrance ramp. He is indeed vibin' as he makes his way down to the ring.

Naida West: Quinn and Ninja teamed up last week in a winning effort alongside Eternal Champion Cruze. But can they parry that success into another win with a new partner in Bonnie Derryberry?

Hannibal Burress: Speaking of Bonnie, you ever seen that kinda meat on a white girl?? I hope this match goes for at least an hour…

Naida West: Ugh. Men.

Frewbly introduces Murder Ninja, who jumps onto the ring apron and grabs the top rope. Before Dunkin can finish the introduction, Ninja catapults into the ring, rolling up and catching Knees with a hurricanrana that sends the latter under the bottom ropes. Nicky and Donnie rush up to Ninja, throwing hambones at the Eternal Title contender. They back him against the ropes, Ninja rolling under the bottom. At this moment, Quinn rushes up and clotheslines the duo from behind, sending them over the ropes and to the floor next to their partner. Ninja looks up to Quinn, the bigger man nodding. Castillo helps Ninja to his feet, the latter quickly backing away as Derryberry shoots past and leaps over the ropes, tackling the trio outside.

Nadia West: A lot of action to start this match, and the oddballs have managed to start strong here!!

Hannibal Burress: To be fair, Bonnie is pretty distracting…

Derryberry picks up Donnie, tossing him into the ring. She follows in after, Quinn and Ninja heading to their corner so the match can officially start. Tim Jansen calls for the bell, Bonnie lifting Donnie and throwing a forearm to his face. Donnie tries to shake it off as Bonnie throws another, then a third. He drops to a knee, Bonnie reaching down to pick him up by the hair. Donnie throws a chop at her throat, causing Bonnie to drop back a step. Donnie turns, jumping to his corner to tag in Knees. Knees quickly jumps in, tackling Bonnie to the mat and driving fists into her forehead.

Hannibal Burress: Hey!! What an underhanded move!!

Nadia West: The Three DUDES using some dirty tactics, but slowly climbing back into the match.

Knees gets up, turning to Quinn and Ninja. He mocks the two, causing Quinn to start in, only to be stopped by Jansen. Knees turns back to Bonnie, who has started to a knee, and throws a thumb to her eye. She falls back a few steps, where Nicky is waiting to spin her around and use a belly-to-belly to throw her into the corner. Nicky rolls out as Jansen turns back to the action, Knees tagging in Donnie.

Donnie takes a moment to flip the bird to Murder Ninja and Costillo, turning to Bonnie in the corner. He starts laying in with boots, Jansen yelling at him to back off. Donnie shrugs him off, continuing to lay stomps in the corner. Tim starts calling for a DQ.

1! 2!

Nicky tags in.

3! 4!

Donnie backs off, Nicky taking over where he left off. Tim shakes his head and counts off Nicky. Knees tags in.

1! 2! 3! 4! 1! 2!

The tags continue as the DUDES keep stomping a mud hole into Derryberry. After a couple rounds of this, Nicky is again the legal man. Murder Ninja flies across ring and past Jansen, hitting a crossbody into Nicky. Nicky bounces off the turnbuckle and backwards over Ninja, who quickly snatches Bonnie by a foot and drags her to their corner. Donnie tries to start in and keep them from making a tag, but is stopped by Jansen. Quinn immediately tags himself in as Ninja gets Bonnie to the corner, charging at Nicky. He lifts a boot, slamming Nicky in the face and practically turning him inside-out in the process.

Nadia West: Bonnie gets a well-earned rest while Cast Iron comes in to take out the DUDES… wait, now Jansen is stopping Quinn??

Hannibal Burress: He didn't see the tag! Bonnie is still legal! Oh, noes!!

Quinn shakes his head, starting back to his corner. Ninja makes sure Tim can see as HE quickly tags in, hopping over the ropes. Nicky is on all fours as Murder charges up, using Nicky as a step to jump into a double dropkick to Donnie and Knees! The two DUDES hit the floor as Ninja rolls up, jumping into a DDT onto Nicky! Cover!

1! 2! 3!

Hannibal Burress: Did you see that?! Tim's hand was a fraction of an inch from the mat!! That should've been a win!!

Nadia West: Somehow Nicky gets the shoulder up at the absolute last second, keeping the Three DUDES alive!

Murder Ninja looks at Jansen, Tim confirming the 2. Ninja shakes his head in disbelief, slapping the mat. He stands, reaching down and grabbing Nicky by the hair. He lifts Nicky to his feet, spinning around. Knees makes the blind tag as Nicky rebounds, Ninja hitting a crazy spinning back kick to Nicky!! Nicky falls, and the cover!!

Nadia West: Jansen saw the tag, but Murder Ninja didn't!!

Hannibal Burress: Watch out, Ninja!!

Ninja turns to Tim, who shakes his head and indicates a tag made. Ninja turns, being met with a boot directly to the face. Boos reign through the crowd, Knees flipping the bird as he drops onto Ninja's chest and starts laying in with punches. Nicky slowly rolls out of the ring as Knees' heavy fists rain down on Ninja. Tim tells Knees to back off, counting to a DQ. At four, Knees raises his hands and rolls off Ninja. He laughs as he walks to his corner, tagging in Donnie. Donnie runs in, hitting a baseball slide on Ninja as he uses the ropes to get up. Ninja drops to the outside, Donnie getting to his feet and charging across the ring, rebounding and comes back… tope suicida to Ninja!! Donnie kip-ups, charging back to the ring and running over to tag in Knees. Knees starts in, Donnie running over again and launching over the top rope into a tope con hiro!! Knees charges up behind him, jumping onto the top rope… then changes his momentum and launches a dropkick into Quinn!!

Nadia West: You don't have to like it, but you really have to respect the teamwork between The Three DUDES. That was a beautiful move by Knees to use Donnie and Ninja as a distraction to attack the big man Quinn Castillo.

Hannibal Burress: As long as he leaves Bonnie alone. I can almost make out… uhm… the paint… lines…

Nadia West: You're hopeless.

Donnie gets Ninja to his feet and tosses him into the ring. Knees stalks over, jumping onto the second rope and coming back with a splash onto Ninja's back. Ninja is rolled onto his back as Donnie slides into a cover.

1!
2!

Nadia West: And a great job there by Bonnie as she jumps over that top rope and hits a splash to break the count.

Hannibal Burress: But how much damage did she do to herself?

Nadia West: You mean her partner.

Hannibal Burress: Sure. That.

Nadia shakes her head as Bonnie starts out of the ring. Donnie walks up, screaming in her face. Bonnie shrugs, nodding behind Donnie to remind him of the match going on. Donnie doesn't care, throwing a palm… but it's caught! Donnie turns around to see who grabbed his hand…

Hannibal Burress: HOLY HELL! That headbutt knocked Donnie damn near into the afterlife!

Nadia West: Quinn hasn't been legal as of yet in this match, but he's been doing a decent job of supporting his partners.

Tim Jansen instructs Quinn to exit the ring; which Castillo does without protest. He and Bonnie exchange respectful nods, turning to Murder Ninja in the ring. Ninja uses the ropes to struggle to his feet, starting towards his corner. Nicky starts into the ring, being stopped by Jansen. The resulting distraction causes Tim to miss a tag to Quinn, who steps over the top rope and starts over on Donnie. Nicky dips back out of the ring as Quinn lifts Donnie, pulling him up for a gorilla press slam. Tim yells at Quinn for being in the ring; Quinn trying to explain but Jansen still adamant about not seeing a legal tag. Nicky and Knees rush the ring, passing Quinn and Jansen to knock Bonnie off the ring apron. Quinn turns to help his partners, chasing Nicky and Knees outside. Nicky throws Ninja back into the ring as Knees distracts Quinn. Quinn attempts a clothesline, Knees ducking under. Quinn turns around, being knocked to the ground as Nicky rushes around the corner and joins Knees in a double dropkick. Knees jumps up, motioning for Nicky to rush to their corner. Ninja and Donnie pull themselves up on opposite ends of the ring using their respective sides' ropes, Nicky running up to the corner and quickly making the tag. He jumps in, whipping his partner across the ring. Murder Ninja barely pulls himself out of the way, causing Donnie to head into the ropes. He prepares for a move on the rebound, but is caught off-guard as Nicky grabs him around the waist from behind. The momentary shock is enough for Donnie to run up with a clothesline, aiding Nicky into a German suplex with a bridge!

1!!
2!!
THREee… NO!!

Naida West: Bonnie just barely making the save there!!

Hannibal Burress: That's the hottest save I've ever seen!!

Naida West: Hottest? You mean closest??

Hannibal Burress: If you mean how close her body paint is to being completely dissolved… then yeah!!

Donnie grabs up Bonnie, who reacts with an uppercut. Donnie falls back a few steps, Bonnie roaring up with a leaping knee strike!! Donnie hits the mat and rolls out almost entirely on momentum. Bonnie checks on Ninja before heading to her corner, Knees to his feet. He stalks Ninja as the latter gets to his feet, stumbling just a bit… SUPERKICK FROM KNEES!! Ninja stumbles over the ropes, falling to the ground. Knees grunts, dropping to the mat and rolling out to the floor. He lifts Ninja's lifeless body, using every ounce of energy to roll him back in the ring. Knees takes a moment to breathe, realizing that a man under 200 pounds weighs a metric ton if it's dead weight. He slowly rolls into the ring, dropping into a cover.

1!!
2!!
3! NO!!

Hannibal Burress: MURDER NINJA KICKED OUT!! MURDER NINJA KICKED OUT!! HOW IN THE HELL?!?!

Nadia West: Murder Ninja has to be running entirely on instinct right about now… but he is surviving! My god!

Knees looks up to his partners, flabbergasted. Nicky waves him over, making some kind of gang sign (okay, not a gang sign. But if you never watched wrestling before, what would it look like? Exactly. A gawdayum gang sign. Thank you). Knees walks over, tagging in Donnie. Donnie in turn tags Nicky, all three men entering the ring and surrounding Ninja.

Nadia West: This… this does not look good for Murder Ninja.

Hannibal Burress: Lord, we pray that Murder Ninja doesn't actually die tonight. Please allow him to survive these trials and breathe another day, cuz I can't afford a paycut for the company to settle that particular lawsuit…

Knees and Donnie lift Ninja, screaming obscenities at him. Nicky stands behind Ninja, charging at the ropes. He rebounds as Knees and Donnie step back, looking for dual SUPERKI…

Nadia West: WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!

Hannibal Burress: GAWD ANSWERS OUR PRAYAS, SISTER!!

Murder Ninja, on instinct or adrenaline or pure dumb luck, backflips away from Donnie and Knees. His sudden move throws Nicky as well, who slides beneath Ninja and directly into his partners. Ninja lands on his feet, but falls backwards into the ropes. Nicky turns around, his eyes bulging from his head as he realizes where Ninja is. He leaps…

Hannibal Burress: THE TAG TO QUINN CASTILLO!!

Nadia West: And the referee FINALLY sees it!!

Quinn starts into the ring, Nicky rushing up… massive headbutt!! Nicky drops to his ass as Knees charges up… uranage!!! Donnie is on his feet… big boot directly to the face!! Cast Iron is cleaning house as he turns, picking Knees up. He watches as Nicky gets to his feet… and throws Knees into Nicky!! Castillo turns around, Donnie to a knee; Quinn picks Donnie up and puts the smaller man over his shoulders… Samoan Drop! Donnie rolls out of the ring! Nicky and Knees help each other to their feet as Quinn charges the opposite side of the ring, he rebounds… DOUBLE SPEAR!!

Hannibal Burress: Quinn Costillo is absolutely cleaning house!! He's been waiting all match to get into this thing, and he is absolutely dominating!!

Nadia West: The Three DUDES were specifically trying NOT to let the big man in the match, and now everyone can see why!!

Quinn lets out a triumphant, animalistic roar as he surveys the ring. Nicky and Knees are splayed out by the ropes while Donnie is unconscious outside, Bonnie in the corner shifting her focus between the match and Murder Ninja. Castillo looks at the ref, pointing at the two DUDES in the ring and asking for clarification. Jansen motions to Nicky, an almost evil grin starting to cross the face of Quinn.

Nadia West: The Three DUDES dominated a good bit of this match, and kept Murder Ninja secluded for a while… but I think their strategy has just hit THE brick wall.

Hannibal Burress: Gawd, please let these men live through whatever Quinn is about to do to them. I've seen the medical insurance plans we have and I don't think death is covered…

Quinn motions to Bonnie, who quickly runs along the ring apron and hits Knees with a vicious punt kick. Knees topples lifeless to the floor as Quinn lifts Nicky onto his shoulders, Bonnie and Murder Ninja ascending parallel turnbuckle.

Hannibal Burress: And there goes Cast Iron Quinn with the Cast Down!!

Nadia West: That crucifix powerbomb just set up Murder Ninja and Bonnie for their own finishers!! 630 senton and a diving headbutt IN UNISON!!

Murder with Mad Flippy Shit, next to a ca-caw'ing Derryberry with a Flyby, Nicky is entirely out of commission!! Quinn drops into a cover as Ninja and Bonnie block any attempts from the other two DUDES, Tim Jansen dropping into the count.

ONE!!

TWO!!

THREE!!

The crowd erupts in a roar as Jansen calls for the bell, Audioslave's "Gasoline" blaring from the PA system. Quinn stands as his partners join him, the trios' hands being raised in victory.

Dunkin Frewbly: Here are your winners, the team of Murder Ninja, Bonnie Derryberry, and Quinn! Castillo!!!

The three shake hands, each sliding out of the ring. They continue their celebration up the ramp as the Three DUDES gather together to recoup.

Nadia West: A tough loss from The Three DUDES tonight, but they sure put up a fight. All respect to this little trio, and here's hoping they have better luck in the near future.

Hannibal Burress: The only loss I give a damn about is the 90% of Bonnie's body paint being lost during this match… come back here, baby girl! Lemme see dem cheeks!

Nadia West: Ugh. We'll be back after these words from whatever sponsors we still have…

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Danny Segment

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The crowd cheers as Danny is seen backstage once more, gripping at his hair frantically and pacing around, arguing with someone (prolly some frickin' rich dude) via bluetooth.

Danny Powers: I know I know! Listen I've asked everyone! I can't find ONE person who isn't at least a little bit weirded out by the naked lady! Besides, most of my guys and gals are already busy! I can't find one person willing to step up to the challenge! There's not ONE PERSON WHO-

?: Hold on, pal, hold on!

Danny pivots and raises a curious brow.

Danny Powers: I'll..call you back.

?: You said not one PERSON. I think I can be of service to ya.

The crowd marks the fuck out as Danny and the camera both look towards ankle height at Wrestleverse's top koala, Zaza.

Zaza: Wild Things versus that naked lady and my guy.

Danny Powers: You know what? Screw it. You're on. At Fatal, it will be Wild Things versus Bonnie Derryberry and Roo in a Break the Ice match for the Parallel Championships. Best of luck.

Danny walks off, shaking his head questioning his own decision making as he does.

Zaza: Too easy.

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Erik Holland/TJ Alexander vs. Shrenk/Robert Feast

Hannibal: Up next we have a tag match!

Naida: Shrenk and Robert Feast taking on TJ Alexander and Erik Holland. Should be a good one.

Hannibal: Can’t wait to see what these guys can do in the ring together.

As white smoke fills the entrance ramp "Demi-Gods" by Lab rats and Slim J hits the PA System and a TJ Alexander steps into the white smoke, he kneels down for a few seconds before heading down to the ring, he gets to the ring and rolls under the bottom rope, he then leaps onto the turnbuckle and starts hyping himself up.

Dunklin: Introducing first, from London England, TJ alexander!

The crowd pops as the lights suddenly completely shut off as a black and white film appears on the screen; us science-fic buffs will notice it's part of the Invasion of the Body Snatchers trailer. We hear the panicked voice of Dr. Miles Bennell; and the crowd HITS THEIR FEET, cheering so loud it's almost drowning it out.



"Will you tell these fools I'm NOT CRAZY! Make them listen to me before it's too late!



...Listen to me. Please listen. If you don't, if you won't; if you fail to understand, then the same incredible terror that's menacing me will STRIKE AT YOU!"



Out of nowhere, Autonomous Combat System absolutely DETONATES over the loudspeaker, reducing the stage to a red-strobing mosh pit as Erik Holland shoves his way through the curtain, goggles shining in the inky red-ness, tugging at his hair, tugging at his beard as he staggers up and down the stage, imploring the raging crowd to cheer even louder; but at the same time almost looking like he's arguing with himself. Once the lyrics start, Erik ROARS and makes a beeline for the ring, pinballing off the fans to tag hands with them, let them slap his back, whatever it takes to whip the audience in attendance into a complete frenzy. Every now and then down the ramp he stops, turning around in a lazy circle, taking it all in before racing off again.



He dives under the ropes once he gets to ringside, crawling on his belly toward the hard camera. He pulls the lenses of the welding goggles off his eyes so we can see that demented gleam burning in those brown irises, then he mugs for the camera shouting indistinct threats--even chewing on the bottom rope--before he bursts to his feet and hits the opposite side ropes, THROWING his hands out and receiving flashbulbs in response. Holland whips his coat off, tossing it out into the first row and does the same with his goggles, staring out under that eye makeup and proud of how completely insane his fans are, before he settles into the corner, that eerie look of focus taking over. The lights finally come up.

Dunklin: And his partner, from Silent Hill, weighing in at 303lbs, 'The Haunted' Erik Holland!

Cool for Cats by Squeeze hits the PA and the crowd all goes "psst pssst psst pssst psssst!" Robert Feast comes out and lifts his arms up cause he's a human but then he runs really fast down to the ring and slides in real sleek. He goes immediately after the team of TJ and Erik throwing punches and darting all over the ring to try and avoid them.

Hannibal: Feast not wanting to wait for his partner out here! He wants a fight!

Naida: He looks wired! Think he’s been on the nip again.

Melancholia starts up over the PA system as Shrenk slowly shuffles out from the back, he’s clearly in no hurry as TJ and Erik are stomping down on feast hard in the ring. He walks over to the ring steps and takes a seat.



DING! DING! DING!

Naida: I think he’s in the match now?

Hannibal: Hard to tell, but we’re starting off with TJ and Feast in the ring at the moment.

Feast has managed to scramble to his feet and is slowly circling TJ making a hissing sound, Shrenk has pulled an onion out of his pocket and takes a big bite with the few teeth he has.

Naida: Wrestleverse is a weird place.

Feast pounces at TJ who manages to duck out of the way, TJ follows up with a big dropkick knocking off his feet. As he gets closer to hit his next move, Feast swipes at TJ’s shin causing him to fall to one knee clutching at it.

Hannibal: He just swiped at his leg? Is that legal?

Feast knees TJ in the head then runs up the corner turnbuckle and flings himself backwards, landing on all fours on TJ’s chest.

Naida: I don’t even know what that move is called. Looks like it hurt though.

Feast takes off again, doing a small circle round the ring before charging at TJ. This time he’s met with a large clothesline which flips him inside out. TJ rubs his sore chest and starts stomping on Feast, making sure he stays grounded.

Hannibal: TJ not messing around this week, he’s tasted victory now and wants more!

Naida: He’s got Feast up, he hits a huge pump handle slam! This could be it!

One…Two…

Hannibal: Not over yet! What the hell is Shrenk eating? Why does that onion look like it’s bleeding?

TJ lifts up Feast and throws him hard against the ropes which sends him flying out of the ring. He wastes no time in following up and jumping over the ropes onto him.

Naida: Air TJ!

Feast scrambles to get to his feet, he starts reaches for the steps to prop himself up but knocks the onion out of Shrenks hand. The big man slowly rises to his feet whilst glaring at Feast.

Hannibal: Erm Shrenk, that’s your partner buddy.

Without a word, Shrenk lifts Robert above his head in a military press before dropping him on the top of his head directly onto the steps.

Hannibal: Jesus!!

Naida: The hell is he doing?!

Hannibal: I guess he really wanted that onion?

TJ sidesteps round the heavily breathing Shrenk and picks up Feast who is basically a dead weight, he throws him in the ring and slides in after then tags Erik in.

Naida: Erik tagged in but is it even worth it at this point?

Erik walks in the ring and smiles, pointing to Shrenk.

Hannibal: Holland wants Shrenk! Might not be the best idea though.

Erik grabs the non-moving Feast by the wrist and uses his hand to slap Shrenk who is sat on the ring apron. He smiles and turns around, slowly getting in the ring. He stands and looks eye to eye with Erik Holland, the crowd start to cheer as the big men start shouting at each other, the anger rising before reaching boiling point.

Naida: Here we go! Big right hands from Erik!

Shrenk stumbles back as Holland runs back against the ropes and hits a huge dropkick, the big ogre like creature stumbles again against the ropes but doesn’t go down. Holland looking stunned and runs back against the ropes, clotheslining himself and Shrenk straight over the top.

Hannibal: Both men out but they’re not stopping, brawling all over the place now!

Shrenk grabs the back of Hollands hair and starts slamming his head repeatedly into the barricade, laughing manically as he thrusts Hollands head down over and over. Eventually Erik manages to get an elbow into Shrenks guts which winds him. Holland stands up straight, blood dripping down his forehead.

Naida: Erik busted open!

Hannibal: I think it’s just making him angrier though!

Holland throws himself at Shrenk, knocking him back into the steps before throwing right and left hands at his head. Whilst he has him dazed, Holland grabs him round his waist and hits a spinebuster right onto the steps.

Naida: Man those steps are seeing a lot of action tonight!

Erik wipes the blood from his face and charges at Shrenk again, this time though he misses and hits the steps himself. No-one home for Holland, Shrenk picks him up and hits a hard powerbomb against the barricade.

Hannibal: Oh man! That can’t do your back any favours.

Naida: These two are going at it tonight!

Once he manages to get him up, Shrenk looks to throw Erik against the barricade but Holland manages to maneuver on his feet and throws Shrenk into it instead. He follows up with a massive big boot leaving his opponent slumped over.

Hannibal: He’s still not down!

Holland climbs up onto the apron and hits a huge elbow drop onto the back on Shrenks head. He finally hits the floor.

Naida: Erik Holland with the impressive debut here in Wrestleverse.

Hannibal: Both men back on their feet now! This is turning into an all out war!

Shrenk places his foot on Hollands chest and pushes back as hard as he can, Erik goes tumbling back across the floor. Shrenk follows after and grabs him, lifting him straight from the floor to above his head.

Naida: Deadlift military press from Shrenk there! Impressive strength! He’s thrown him back in the ring! In he follows.

Hannibal: Erik is back up but Shrenks got him in the sleeper hold, he’s struggling but can’t seem to get out of it.

Naida: Wait he’s managing to drag Shrenk to his corner! What strength! He’s reaching out, TJ gets the tag!

TJ jumps into the ring and starts to help pull Shrenk off of Holland. When they eventually get him loose, the two start unloading on the big man, finishing up with a double dropkick that sends him flying back into his own corner. Robert Feast who is back onto the apron barely slaps him on the shoulder.

Naida: Robert Feast?

Hannibal: But I thought he was dead!

Feast jumps onto the top rope and dives at TJ and Erik who manage to grab him. Erik throws him at TJ who catches him in a cutter.

Naida: Man he’s going to wish he didn’t get back in the ring.

TJ goes for the cover! Holland goes to stop Shrenk but sees he's in the corner smiling making no attempt to break up the pin.


One! Two! Three!

Hannibal: This ones over! TJ and Holland pick up the victory here!

Dunklin: Ladies and gentlemen here are your winners, the team of TJ Alexander and Erik Holland!

---

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Our scene cuts to the backstage where CruZe and Axis are standing on either side of El Gringo Loco who has the Eternal Championship cradled safely in his arms. Both of the men scheduled to compete in the main event are dressed out and apparently prepared for their upcoming match. Behind EGL's mask there is a smile of satisfaction as CruZe steps into the limelight.

CruZe: What you see before you is something that the whole WrestleVerse didn't believe they would witness. If you had told anyone mere months ago that Axis and I would be willing tag team partners taking on the Parallel Champions, you would have been drug tested and probably committed. But, this is reality now. This is the reality of the WrestleVerse. The XBI has taken over this whole place, and our grip on it gets tighter with each passing show.

CruZe raises a hand and makes a fist as if gripping something unseen, showing his audience exactly what he means.

CruZe: We've kept everyone guessing from day one, and we have held every single accolade there is to hold in the WrestleVerse except one. And, now is our time to show that we deserve our opportunity. While the Kyle Williams and Amelia Winston won't be defending against us, we can make a huge statement tonight about why we deserve our shot. Sure, Bonnie Derryberry etched her opportunity in stone so once we take care of business tonight, we will be waiting on the other side of the Premium Live Event. Of that you can be certain. I can assure all of you that I'll be doing just that at Fatal when I face that scrub, Murder Ninja. I will be standing in the middle of the ring when Ninja is forced to hear Dunklin say those sacred words: 'AND STILL!'

As CruZe says this, he pats his Eternal title which is still cradled away in El Gringo Loco's arms.

CruZe: "Listen well. You aren't looking at some rag-tag, thrown-together tag team though. What you're looking at is two men who have come to know one another despite past issues. What you're looking at is too men who have taken one another on the ring and understand how the other fights."

Finally, Axis chimes in.

Axis: "What you're looking at is Project Gemini."

CruZe: "So, hold on to those titles, Wild Things. ...Or don't."

CruZe shrugs and laughs as the three of them walk out of the scene...

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Boxing Match
Roo vs. Scuffed God

---

Summary and note: This is coming tomorrow. Danny has had a week and got busy and is very sorry. This match and everything else will be up in full tomorrow. Much love.

Anyways, Roo hit Scuffed God with a lot of big meaty jabs...like A LOT of them. It's actually incredible SG didn't fuckin' die lol.

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Wild Things Segment

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Kyle Williams and Amelia Winston are sat in the locker room lacing their boots. Beside them are the parallel titles. Amelia takes a swig of energy drink as Kyle leans back and picks up his title belt.

Kyle: You know something? Bigger isn’t always better.

Amelia looks him up and down and gives him a perplexed look.

Amelia: Something you want to tell me?

Kyle: The damn XBI, walking around here, injecting themselves into every damn title scene they can. Trying to recruit half the roster. Snatching up belts all over the place. Having more members doesn’t make you a better team, having the world title in your possession doesn’t make you a better team. They seem to think I’ve never encountered a bully before.

Amelia: Well they’re going to learn the hard way if they think they can push us around.

Kyle: They think we should be scared that they’re ‘coming for our titles?’

Amelia: Fuck no! They should be scared that we’re going after theirs!

Kyle: They think we’re going to just sit back and let them steamroll the whole federation?

Amelia: Fuck no! Us and these belts are the last line of defence against those sons of bitches!

Kyle: They think we’re scared of horses!?

Amelia: I don’t think anyone is accusing us of that.

Kyle: Well we’re not! They can go out on their damn space adventures with their robo legs and creepy Dad. But the Wild Things are gonna be doing what we do best, training damn hard…

Amelia: …and kicking some arse.

Kyle: Hey you did the British one, nice.

Amelia: Let’s go show them what we’re made of.

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Main Event

Project Gemini vs. Wild Things

---

Naida West: It's time for the main event!

Hannibal Buress: That's right! Project Gemini, representing the XBI, go against the Parallel Champions, Wild Things, in a non-title match!

MaX-Files: And you've got to think that has Championship implications, guy.

Naida West: Where did you come from?

Max-Files: I just teleported in, and boy are my pattern buffers tired!

Hannibal Buress: What a treat, denizens of WrestleVerse! THE CHAMP, Max Moonstone -

MaX-Files: Hopper. I was only Max Moonstone when I had the Moonstone. Those are the rules to unlock its power, you see.

Hannibal Buress: Max Hopper has joined us here in the broadcast booth. And might I say you look great with gold!

MaX-Files: Thanks, guy. And I beat Aiden Reynolds in record time! No other Championship in WrestleVerse has changed hands in less than 5 seconds.

Naida West: Yes, but it was a very controversial ending to Eternal #4.

MaX-Files: What was so controversial about it? I cashed in the Moonstone according to the rules and I won. Aiden Reynolds put up a heck of a fight, but he was no match for me in the end.

Naida West: And what about your XBI teammates' role in it all?

Max-Files: They were just there to make sure KERBEROS didn't try to help his buddy, lady guy.

Naida West: Well, you may have just painted yourself into a corner, because in just two weeks, you'll inevitably have to defend that title against Jaice Wilds, with a number one contenders match happening in another ring at the same time! Then, if you're lucky enough to beat Jaice, you'll have to defend against the winner of that match!

MaX-Files: I won't need luck to beat Jaice. He -

MaX is cut off as lasers kick on and "Intergalactic" by the Beastie Boys begins to play.

Dunklin Frewbly: This next match is scheduled for…

Crowd: ONE FALL!

Dunklin Frewbly: And is the main event of the evening. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by El Gringo Loco, representing the XBI… at a combined weight of 480 pounds… The Eternal Champion CruZe and Axis… PROJECT… GEMINI!!!

MaX-Files: Here come the Parallel Champions!

Naida West: They aren't the Parallel Champions, Max. Wild Things are, and this match isn't for the titles!

MaX-Files: Wait, when are we right now? I just got back from the future, where the XBI holds all the gold in WrestleVerse!

Hannibal Buress: Wow, that's impressive, Max!

Naida West: If you believe that, Hannibal, I have a bridge to sell you…

Hannibal Buress: Is it in a good school district?

Axis and CruZe make their way to the ring, acknowledging their XBI teammate MaX-Files as they pass by. CruZe holds up the Eternal Championship for all the fans to see as they enter the ring. Axis pats him on the back and throws up his patented "Quadruple Horns."

MaX-Files: I've got my money on Project Gemini tonight. CruZe is the Eternal Champion and the longest reigning Champion in WrestleVerse, and now that he and Axis are gellin' like Magellan, nothing's gonna stop them!

Dunklin Frewbly: And their opponents, at a combined weight of 342 pounds… the Parallel Tag Team Champions… "Wildheart'' Amelia Winston… Kyle Williams… WILD THINGS!!!

The intro to ‘Never take us alive’ starts up as spotlights dart over the cheering crowd. As the guitar kicks in, Amelia Winston and Kyle Williams walk out to the top of the ramp whilst wearing their Parallel titles round their waist to a huge pop from the crowd.

MaX-Files: This is wild. I can barely hear myself think!

Hannibal Buress: What?

MaX-Files: What?

Hannibal Buress: What?

They both go to opposite ends of the top of the ramp and remove their titles, raising them high in the air as the crowd goes wild.

MaX-Files: Believe It or Not, Kyle Williams was on our shortlist of potential invitees to the XBI when we first started. No pun intended.

Naida West: Really?

MaX-Files: Oh yeah, the guy's really talented, and he has a great personality.

Meeting back in the centre, they fist bump and make their way down the ramp. Amelia high fiving her adoring crowd as she goes and Kyle just nodding and waving. Because germs. As they reach the ring, Kyle vaults over the top rope as Amelia does her trademark backflip, they climb opposite turnbuckles and hoist their titles high above their heads again before getting to their corner and waiting for the fight.

DING DING DING!!!

Naida West: There's the bell, and it looks like Amelia Winston and CruZe will start things off.

MaX-Files: Get her, CruZe!

Naida West: Collar-and-elbow… CruZe whips Amelia into the ropes. She ducks the leg lariat and takes him down with a lucha-style armdrag. And another!

Hannibal Buress: Amelia tags in Kyle Williams, and CruZe makes the tag to Axis.

Axis catches Kyle Williams with a few jabs, but Kyle ducks the hook attempt and springboards off the middle rope.

MaX-Files: Kyle Williams uses his height disadvantage to his advantage by ducking that hook. Springboard cross body, but Axis catches him in mid-air! And look at that big powerslam!

Axis hooks the leg.

1!

2!

Kickout!

MaX-Files: Aw, Axis almost had him.

Hannibal Buress: Winston was ready to make the save, but it wasn't needed, as Kyle Williams managed to kick out.

MaX-Files: Look at that teamwork from Project Gemini! Axis just drove Kyle Williams' head into CruZe's boot. Tag made.

Hannibal Buress: And CruZe's legs are made of steel, or adamantium, or something.

MaX-Files: Yup. That's right, guy.

CruZe hops over the top rope and takes Kyle down with a shinbreaker.

Naida West: Nice shinbreaker by CruZe, and now he applies an Indian deathlock.

MaX-Files: Those cybernetic legs really make that deathlock hurt even more. And look at CruZe snapping back down to the mat to put even more pressure on. He could break Kyle's leg! Tap out, Kyle, save yourself!

Kyle's effort to fight the pain is nothing short of heroic. Amelia comes in to help, but the referee cuts her off. This gives CruZe and Axis an opportunity to make an illegal switch!

Naida West: Hey, they didn't make a tag!

MaX-Files: Yeah, but CruZe left the ring, so it's ok.

Naida West: Those aren't the rules!

MaX-Files: Are you sure? El Gringo Loco is always drafting up interesting match contracts.

Naida West: Axis keeps Kyle Williams grounded with that stomp.

MaX-Files: Look at that suplex! That was as crisp as an ice cold glass of Fresca. That one's for you, Davey Boy O'Brien!

Naida West: While Max Hopper is giving a shout out, Axis is going for a lateral press.

1!

2!

Shoulder up!

Naida West: Kyle Williams gets his shoulder up.

MaX-Files: So close.

Hannibal Buress: Axis has him up for a powerbomb now… No! Williams counters with a hurricanrana -

MaX-Files: Hopper Can Rana.

Hannibal Buress: He hooks both legs…

1!

2!

Kickout!

Naida West: Axis kicks out, but Kyle Williams desperately needs to make the tag.

MaX-Files: Look at this. Axis has him in his sights…

Naida West: Kyle ducks the Superkick 291 and rolls through… He makes the tag! In comes Amelia, and she drops Axis with a Russian leg sweep!

CruZe comes in to help, but he's hit with a spinning wheel kick.

Naida West: Spinning wheel kick takes down CruZe. Amelia covers Axis and hooks the leg…

1!

2!

CruZe makes the save!

MaX-Files: Good job, buddy!

Naida West: CruZe makes the save just in the nick of time.

The referee ushers CruZe back to his corner!

MaX-Files: Great job by Axis reversing that whip into the corner. That's why we brought him into the XBI and took him under our X-wings.

Naida West: Axis charges in but nobody's home, and he runs right into the turnbuckle. Big tornado DDT by Amelia!

Amelia goes up to the top rope.

MaX-Files: What a moonsault by "Wildheart"! She hooks the leg… Come on, Axis, kick out!

1!

2!

Kickout!

Naida West: CruZe is coming into the ring. Pocket Rocket by Kyle Williams! Now he's got an ankle lock on CruZe!

MaX-Files: Oh no. Those legs are expensive!

Naida West: Look at CruZe freaking out!

Hannibal Buress: Not for long! Awooga Kick by Axis!

MaX-Files: Thank you, Axis!

Naida West: Dream Mode! Amelia Winston has her dragon sleeper locked in, and Axis is fading fast!

Axis drops down to his knees. This puts Amelia at the perfect height for a basement Yakuza kick from CruZe.

MaX-Files: Yeah! Cybernetic Kick! Good one, buddy guy!

CruZe makes the pin.

1!

2!

3!!!

DING DING DING!!!

Dunklin Frewbly: Your winners by pinfall…

Axis and CruZe…

PROJECT…

GEMINI!!!


As CruZe and Axis stand in the ring after the match, a ball suddenly drops at the Eternal Champion’s feet and explodes into a large cloud of smoke. In the confusion, everyone except CruZe bails out of the ring.

Hannibal Buress: What the hell is going on?!

Naida West: Here comes security!

It’s as Naida says, security runs out from the back and surrounds the ring. Axis wants to go in and check on CruZe, but they won’t allow him to do it.

Hannibal Buress: The man’s just trying to check on his partner…!

As the smoke clears, we see Murder Ninja in the ring with CruZe. Before the champion can even try to start fighting, Ninja begins laying into him with punches.

Hannibal Buress: What the hell is Murder Ninja doing?!

Naida West: I’d say he’s taking some revenge tonight.

Max Hopper: Someone has to stop him!

Almost as soon as Max Hopper finishes talking, a couple security personnel get into the ring and are immediately attacked by Murder Ninja who discards them back through the ropes.

Max Hopper: Why is security so useless…?

Hannibal Buress: Better yet, why hire security if they can’t keep order?

Fortunately for CruZe, this gives him the opening he needs as he kicks Murder Ninja in the groin!

Hannibal Buress: Ouch!

Max Hopper: That’s more like a quadruple ouch!

Naida West: No, that’s a cheap shot!

Max Hopper: This isn’t a match, Naida!

Hannibal Buress: Yeah, Murder Ninja assaulted the Eternal Champion!

CruZe goes to the turnbuckle, unties the pad, and rips it off.

Naida West: So how do you two justify this?!

Max Hopper: Hannibal already said it a minute ago.

Hannibal Buress: Murder Ninja assaulted the Eternal Champion!

CruZe grabs Murder Ninja by the hair and pulls him to his feet before Irish whipping the #1 Contender to the Eternal title directly into the turnbuckle causing Murder Ninja to drop face first to the canvas from the impact to his back.

Naida West: This is despicable…

CruZe doesn’t seem to be finished yet as he begins pulling up the padding of the ring to reveal the wood underneath. More security tries to get into the ring, but CruZe is able to fight them off easily and dispose of them.

Hannibal Buress: What do we pay these guys for…?

Max Hopper: Who knows…?

CruZe turns his attention back to Ninja with ill-intent all over his face.

Naida West: Oh, no…

As Murder Ninja tries to push himself to his feet, CruZe runs toward him looking to possibly Curb Stomp Ninja’s face into the wood.

Naida West: This looks really bad…

Before CruZe can get to him though, Murder Ninja trips him up in a modified drop toe hold and sends CruZe’s face into the wood below!

Naida West: CruZe is on dream street right now! He seems to be retreating!

CruZe instinctively rolls out of the ring, but Ninja is in hot pursuit of him. As CruZe is stumbling around the outside trying to get over to Axis. Ninja begins pulling the padding off of the barricade.

Hannibal Buress: What’s he up to now?

Again, security tries to intervene, but again, they are beaten back about the angry Murder Ninja. Axis tries to get through to help CruZe, but he’s still being forced back by an army of security personnel.

Max Hopper: These guys can hold Axis back, but they can’t hold their own against Murder Ninja? This is ridiculous!

Hannibal Buress: You said it!

Murder Ninja then returns the favor from moments ago and sends CruZe into the unpadded barricade causing CruZe to cry out in pain and slump to the mat.

Naida West: CruZe may be out.

Max Hopper: Security needs to get their acts together!

As CruZe is incapacitated, Murder Ninja pulls up the padding to the ringside floor now, unveiling the concrete floor underneath.

Naida West: This is going way too far now!

Hannibal Buress: As if it wasn’t before…?

Murder Ninja pulls CruZe’s limp body up between his legs and starts to lift him for a piledriver…

Naida West: Someone has to stop this…

Hannibal Buress: Uh.. where did Max go?

A flash of light suddenly appears near Murder Ninja as he’s lifting CruZe up. Out of the flash of light comes none-other-than Max Hopper!

Naida West: There he is!

Hannibal Buress: How did he do that?!

Max immediately grabs CruZe’s feet and counterbalances him down out of the piledriver position then pulls him out of harm’s way.

Hannibal Buress: Thank God for Max!

Murder Ninja wisely jumps the barricade as Axis is finally able to come rushing in to give assistance. Both Max Hopper and Axis hold CruZe up with an arm over each of their shoulders. Meanwhile, Murder Ninja looks on with a grin on his face from the crowd.

That’s when Danny Powers’ music hits.

Hannibal Buress: Now what…?

Naida West: Here comes the boss.

Danny Powers: Cut the music. What the two of you just did to my ringside is ridiculous! It was chaotic. Murder Ninja, CruZe, you two clearly have some issues to resolve, and that’s just perfect because I have an idea for your match at Fatal. Since you want to tear apart my turnbuckles, my ring, and my ringside so damn bad, we’re just going to strip ring and ringside down and let the two of you beat the hell out of one another in a BAREBONES MATCH!

Naida West: Oh my God…!

Hannibal Buress: Things are going to get brutal.

We see Murder Ninja nodding with satisfaction at this announcement. Meanwhile, Max Hopper and Axis try to help CruZe back up the ramp and to the backstage. Danny suddenly directs his attention to Max.

Danny Powers: Axis, you can inform CruZe once he’s coherent so go ahead and take him to the back. As for you, Max, you can stay out here because I have an announcement to make concerning the main event of Fatal…

Axis looks at Max Hopper who just nods back. Axis then grabs CruZe and helps him to the back, leaving Max Hopper on his own with Danny.

[Danny Powers (GM)]

Contract Signing

---

We cut back to the ring where Max and Danny are sat across from each other at a round table in the center of the now fixed up canvas.

Hannibal Buress: Boss man said he had something to say and it looks like it’s that time!

Danny Powers: Max..you’ve caused me some stress over the last few weeks. I mean..A LOT of stress. Now, rules are rules. I get it. You ARE the Wrestleverse Champion.

Max nods and smiles, mouthing the words “That’s right”.

Danny Powers: Still, we’re here for WRESTLING. Wrestling with crazy characters, sure, but I expect WRESTLING. That’s why at Fatal, you WILL defend in the Fatal cage match! On one side, we’ll still see KPN take on Addy A, but on the other it will be Jaice Wilds!

Crowd cheers.

Danny Powers: Versus Max!

Crowd is mixed.

Danny Powers: Versus Aiden Reynolds!

Crowd cheers.

Danny Powers: However, if you do any of your WEIRD shit, you will be STRIPPED of the Wrestleverse Championship!

Naida West: OH DAMN!

Danny Powers: Fair is fair! Five competitors, two rings, one giant ass cage and a bunch of walls! Speaking of..LET’S GET THEM OUT HERE!

Bossman’s voice cracks like a fucking goofball.

Hannibal Buress: It’s about to get real!

“Would you still be there?” by Of Mice and Men hits and Aiden Reynolds comes out rocking a white button up and jeans. He comes from the end of the dock of the big ass floating wrestling island thing and charges down to the ring, leaning over the table with a finger in Max’s face shouting obscenities before quickly grabbing the pen from the middle and signing on one of the dotted lines.

Naida West: Heated already!

Danny Powers: Alright alright. Don’t worry now, Aiden, you’ll get your-

The area is bathed in a pink light as the opening riff of "Cry" by Ashnikko pierces the arena.

"I'm a tough bitch, but I'm sensitive / Coulda, coulda, coulda quick fuck be a sedative?"

Addy walks out to the stage in all her glory.

"It's relative 'cause you were pushing me out to the fucking edge / I'm about to rip all of my hair out 'cause I'm madder than I've ever been"

She licks her lips, exaggerating the movement of her tongue as it circles around.

"I just wanna call you, but I know I can't / Fuck a fuckin' fuckboy, fuckin' up my plans"

Plumping up her cleavage she completes a three hundred and sixty degree spin.

"Lay another finger on me, you could lose a hand / You could lose a hand, you could lose a"

When facing the ring she bends over and touches the floor with one hand and slaps herself twice on the ass with her other hand.

Chunky: Coming to the ring, by way of Venice, California.... ADDY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

As the chorus kicks in, Addy stands up, smiles innocently, points to the ceiling and starts skipping to the ring. Adelaide random picks an audience member, and teases rubbing their face into her cleavage, before wiggling a finger 'no', and continuing to skip along to the ring. Pulling herself onto the ring apron, she does the splits to slide into the ring under the bottom rope.

Addy A: Just gimme the contract!

Addy ignores everyone and grabs the contract off the table, reaching down the front of her pants.

Naida West: Oh no. She won’t! Will she?

She pulls out a pen and scrawls her name with a love heart on the end before tossing it back on the table with a cackling laugh and heading to a corner to perch herself on the turnbuckle.

Hannibal Buress: Well damn!

Warrior by Skarlett Riot hits and KPN dashes out to the ring and makes her way up the steps, shooting glares at the three competitors in the ring before dipping through the ropes.

Naida West: Lot of people have questioned the legitimacy of KPN as a true contender, but the chip on her shoulder is visible!

Kelly Penkzee-Nelson is looking at the commotion going on in the ring. She grabs a microphone before looking at everyone in the ring.

Kelly Penkzee-Nelson: You know….

The fans are leaning to hear what she might say.

Kelly Penkzee-Nelson: I’ve been quiet about a few things, and it seems like the talk is “KPN has only been here for a short minute, she doesn’t deserve to be in this match, and that she’s nothing but an entitled bitch!”

The fans are booing at the comments that were made

Kelly Penkzee-Nelson: I think I need to remind you of something - I have NEVER BEEN entitled! Everything that was put out in front of me, I would take it! Do you think I would be stupid enough to deny a World Championship shot?!

The fans are cheering for her statement

Kelly Penkzee-Nelson; HELL NO! No matter what anyone thinks, I am not going to let this opportunity slip out of my hands.

She looks at everyone that’s in the ring.

Kelly Penkzee-Nelson: Everyone of you are talented and have the same goal in mind, but there could only be ONE world champion, and that world champion is ME!

The fans are cheering as KPN drops the microphone and signs the contract.

Naida West: Just like that, we’re down to one!

The crowd and those in ring turn to the ring. No music plays. Instead, Jaice Wilds comes from the back, donning sweats and his own (yes, his own) Wrestleverse t-shirt. He looks at the ground as he makes his way down the ramp, twirling a mic around lazy as fuck.

Hannibal Buress: Bit of contrast here.

Jaice rolls in and pushes up to his feet. He glances from left to right, picks up the pen, and signs the contract. He goes to lift the mic up and speak, but shakes his head no and drops it.

Naida West: Wow.

Jaice rolls out to decent fanfare and heads back up toward the doc.

Danny Powers: Yes! I knew it! I knew I could count on you guys to have a GOOD, civilized contract signing where nobody gets into ANY altercations! I’m so, so proud of-

Just like that, the boss man is cut off as KPN, Addy, Aiden, and Max all just fucking leap across the table at each other. Chairs are kicked everywhere and mics drop to the mat as fists and forearms fly all fucking over the place.

Danny Powers: NO! THIS IS WHAT I DIDN’T WANT TO HAPPEN! YOU DID THE THING I DIDN’T WANT! SECURITY! SECURITY!

A bunch of fucking jetskis come rushin’ in and a bunch of DUDES rolls up onto the docs and to the ringside area. Within a matter of seconds, the ring and ringside area are full as the competitors are separated.

Hannibal Buress: HERE COMES JAICE! JAICE IS COMING BACK FOR THE FIGHT!

Naida West: Folks, this is pandemonium! We’re out of time! We’ll see you in two weeks at Fatal! Holy damn!